“I matter”, Time, and Space
After years of study, observation, parenting, teaching, and directing I have landed upon foundational truths that apply to all people, especially young children. By working with young children through these principles, they develop into active, happy agents of experience, rather than simply passive recipients of experience.
"I matter"
Each child is right from their perspective. We are charged to explore how each child matters in every situation.
"Time and Space." Give children all the time and space they need to evolve, develop, learn, grow. This is not a race, but rather a nurturing journey, and the natural world that surrounds us, in every way, stands in evidence of that process. Some grasses grow quickly, while trees take years. (Redwoods and Yew trees, thousands!) Some bugs live for days, other animals over a century. The natural world is our greatest and most reliable teacher. Being both wise and understanding, it is also ruthless and unforgiving. It gives and takes without prejudice or judgment. It is "Being." In this way, the children find an immediate relationship within it, for they are also, "Being."
The order of learning that takes place at little earthlings (as a child-led program under the guidance of teachers) is the following;
Children teach each other the most, (this is what we call socialization, conditioning, mimicry / imitation, and social-emotional development.) In a mixed age program like ours, the age ranges from 2.10 months old to 5.5. This is a huge spread developmentally, and each child in turn benefits greatly from contributing to each other's development, understanding, and processing of self, each other and reality.
The environment is 2nd, (in our case we are most fortunate to have the natural world of Golden Gate Park and Ocean Beach!) The information and lessons of nature that get telegraphed, transmitted, conveyed, absorbed and assimilated into the experience, identity and journey of young children far exceeds any capability humans possess. From being on uneven ground (which constantly stimulates the vestibular and proprioceptive systems,) to reflective meditative moments and friendships, the wisdom and intelligence of nature is All. It's completely magical!
Teachers are 3rd - we are there to support and facilitate this precious time in a little earthlings development, when the majority of significant brain development, self identity and esteem, relationship building, views of reality and perceptions of the world are becoming hard-wired.
At Little Earthlings, teachers never use the command, "Use your words," to a child struggling to express complex feelings and thoughts. Rather, we provide the words that we think would support them in getting their needs met, such as:
Can I have a turn when you're done?
I’ll let you know when I’m ready.
I need some space.
Can you let me know when you're ready?
When you order me it makes me feel like this...
When you ask me (instead of ordering me) I want to help as much as I can.
When you say the words, "Excuse me," adults pay attention right away, etc..."
Teachers are also here to support conflict resolution. This requires in-person exchange of ideas, for every situation is contextual and unique. Children tend to use whatever tools they know will work. Those tools, yelling, hitting, biting, etc, are inappropriate but effective which is why they use them. It is our responsibility to facilitate other ways that work, which respect everyone's right "to matter." This is brain and language development, processing and understanding.
This is where the name "little earthlings," comes from. Understanding that these beings, these human organisms are new to this planet, allows us to proceed with the attitude of reminding and remembering, always,
"Oh right! You just arrived here on this planet. Let me explain to you how the species has arrived at social contracts and agreements about how to conduct ourselves and acceptable behaviors. Then YOU can decide how you want to proceed.”
By providing and presenting the world through "Cause and Effect," "If you do this, that might/could happen," the children arrive at their own determinations. They feel like the solution came from them. And indeed it does.
This is experiential learning and agency working hand in hand. Synaptic connections formed, fused and constructed through sensory integration and physical memories. Learning that is immediate and actual, rather than rote memorization which is often fleeting.
Having said all of this, we (the adult caregivers) must also acknowledge that we are human after all, and prone to triggers and mis-takes. Very likely, personal experiences of our own childhoods involved,
Shaming, “Why didn't you know how to do this thing you're not supposed to know how to do yet!”
Betrayal, translated as, “You don't matter.”
Abandonment, which can present as, “I will not respond to you until you learn to behave in ways you haven't learned yet.”
These are NOT welcome in our program.
Furthermore, it is imperative that when we, as parents, educators and instructors "mess up," (react rather than respond, operate from the brain stem instead of the prefrontal cortex) that we "follow up," by modeling what it means to be a human being.
How do we responsibly work with life's unexpected moments?
How do we responsibly reflect upon our own conduct in a way that models for young children how to reflect upon theirs?
It is NEVER too late to "go back" and address something that you "wished you had done differently." It conveys your awareness of the power of your actions and recognizes that we are always learning and growing, (evolving from gross to more sophisticated ways of Being.) We can create new memories through sincerity in the moment. We can repair.
It also conveys that we Learn most from these moments, rather than when life is seemingly moving along in harmony and equilibrium. This approach, of greeting and extracting gifts from hardship rather than the unrealistic expectation of avoiding hardship, is an incredibly valuable ability to acquire at any age, especially these foundational ones. One that gives instead of takes, heals instead of harms.
This is the practice of Little Earthlings as partially described herein. It is a reflective practice that takes as its' most fundamental tenant, the same curiosity, wonder, newness, and inquisitive attitude towards life, that is inherent in every authentically "new" experience. As it happens, each moment in a young child's life is exactly that, an authentically "new" experience, and should be regarded as such. This begins to evolve once they hit 5 years, but remains in part for the rest of our lives. (the Heartwood.)
Our ability to maintain connection with that, colors how we regard our journey here on earth.
As adults and educators, tapping into that "piece," allows us to work with children through empathy and compassion, understanding and authenticity. Life, like birth, is miraculous and painful, a cycle of abundance, depletion and replenishing that only creation and life can provide and exact.
Knowing child development and early childhood education informs developmentally appropriate practices from inappropriate. These humans are not the same as fully matured humans. They require 25 years of incubation to become so.
Working with 3-5 year old brains, nervous systems, bodies, consciousnesses, senses, perceptions, perspectives, awarenesses, requires understanding where each child is in their developmental evolution. Moreover, these areas develop both independently and holistically, requiring an enormous effort on our behalf, to make a study of each child,
individually,
in relationships,
and as part of a family, (who after all are their 1st and most important teachers.)
The family culture, the friendship culture, the school culture, the societal culture, all combine to create "Understanding," of one's self and position within it. We consider this reality. We will, in our first 5 years, form ideas about reality that will always remain with us.
Our ability to meet young children where they are, and to not expect them to be anywhere else is called Responsiveness! The first stage of life is Trust vs Mistrust, and imperative for the survival of the species. Responsiveness creates trust, and therefore it is our first duty as educators to always observe, pay attention and respond to the children in the program as prioritized over everything else. Being responsive is the greatest tool we have to consistanly convey to them that they “They Matter.”
The first 5-7 years of human development is like the heartwood of a tree. The hard wiring that informs the rest of our lives. That which informs and remains as our essential selves, though we may not have direct consciousness of it. As such, these 3-6 hours a day are the children's time. It is their time to discover who they are. To become.
This is not my school, it is theirs. This is not my program, it is theirs. The window of childhood is so brief, and the opportunities to build happy memories of it, of ourselves, of our relationships with others of the earth, of life, will soon be replaced with the institutional world and all of its rules, laws and complexities.
It is my hope that the work we do at little earthlings forest school will potently and positively remain with these children throughout their lives, well preserved deep in their own sense of self, empowering them with the strength and determination they will need to navigate whatever future awaits them.
We are the guardians and curators of this special time within this program. I am extremely honored, appreciative, and humbled that this is what I do.
Wow, I realize this is a lot! However, it is important to me that people understand the significance of what we do, what these years are, and to champion the social perception of our role as educators for these little earthlings., because “THEY MATTER.”
warmly,
David
